Please keep Cathy in your prayers at this time

**UPDATE** - Cathy passed away at 1 pm Houston time Friday, October 12, 2007 - please continue to keep her family in your thoughts and prayers.

- webmaster
friendsofcathy.com

National Depression Screening Day

October signifies the real beginning of the fall season for many of us. Leaves are falling off the trees, the air is cooler, and it’s time to excavate the Halloween decorations out of attic. With the changing of the seasons often comes a changing of how we feel. With all the craziness that defines our lives, many of us complain about being depressed from time to time. Experts now say that 12 million women actually do suffer from depression, and fewer than half are being treated for it. You can get screened for free at hundreds of sites across the country on October 11th, National Depression Screening Day. Check out www.mentalhealthscreening.org to find the location nearest you.

Not just another pretty face….

I have spent some time following political causes recently, and found some interesting information. From Martha Washington to Laura Bush, America’s first ladies have been amazing advocates for the public good. Did you know that Martha Washington organized female volunteers to aid wounded troops, benefiting the Revolutionary War Veterans? Or that Dolly Madison helped rebuild the White House by saving many treasures when the British burned D.C.? Lucy Hayes was all about temperance and suffrage, and pushed for women’s voting rights, and Florence Harding was the first First Lady to actually vote. Lou Hoover helped the Girl Scouts with her publicity efforts, while Eleanor Roosevelt was a champion of civil rights. Mamie Eisenhower raised funds for research on heart disease, after Ike’s heart attack, Lady Bird Johnson is well known for her landscape beautification projects, and Rosalynn Carter worked to bring emotional disorders “out of the closet”. If you were first lady, what would you champion?

Stuck in the 50’s…

I recently returned from Clarksdale, Mississippi, the “home of the blues”. When I drove into the town (population 20,000 is what they claim, but I question it), I felt like I had entered a time warp. It would appear at first glance that everyone here is impoverished (I somehow feel bad writing the word “poor”), that this town just came to a grinding halt sometime in the 50’s and never progressed. There are no visible new businesses, no civic improvements, no progress at first glance. Or second. But upon deeper investigation, I started to feel like I was looking for the wrong thing. Everywhere I turned, people were happy. Chivalry is not dead, it’s alive and thriving in Clarksdale. People know each other, they like each other, they help each other. People move slowly, but it’s because they stop and talk to everyone else on the way to where they’re going. Everyone is important, and treated with respect. Children and the elderly are universally loved, and everyone seems to have a wonderful secret. And maybe they do!

All About the Marketing….

Two summers ago a group of women who were preparing for a charity walk for breast cancer met to decide their team name. One of the participants (a mother of five and stage four cancer patient) tossed out an idea: how about “Save 2nd base,” a playful allusion to the high school system where the “bases” signify the progression from kissing to sex. Remember that expression? She designed a T shirt, drawing two baseballs at breast level above the slogan. The shirts sold like wildfire, and are in boutiques all over the east coast with money donated to breast cancer charities. Who says that cancer can’t turn something devastating into a good thing?

Greetings from Iowa!

I am lucky enough to be one of the working press at the first ever Presidential Forum in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. This morning, Lance Armstrong welcomed the Democratic candidates that came to explain their views on two very important issues, namely cancer research and health care. The event is televised on MSNBC, and hosted by Lance and Chris Matthews, host of MSNBC’s “Hard Ball with Chris Matthews”. I was up close and personal with Hilary Clinton, John Edwards, Bill Richardson and Dennis Kucinich, all of whom explained what they would do if they were elected President. There were about 2700 people in the audience, and when the question was asked “how many of you have been touched by cancer?”, there was a sea of arms waving in the air. Questions included everything from “would you make cancer a top priority?” and “do you take contributions from insurance companies?” to “do you support stem cell research?” and “what would you do first in the Oval Office?” Tomorrow will feature the Republican candidates. The point of all this? To make sure that the promises these candidates make about cancer research (and other diseases that ravage our citizens) and health care in an effort to get elected are recorded, and that the candidate that wins is held accountable. Cancer is the number one killer of Americans under the age of 85. It deserves to be a national priority.

Mail Bag

Shuffling through the mail the other day, I came across a letter with the return address “The White House, Washington D.C.” I was skeptical at first, but upon opening it, I found a note from the United States Press Secretary Tony Snow. To me! Hand-addressed and an actual signature! He and I have something in common–we both are colon cancer survivors. Here’s part of what he said “Thank you for taking the time to pull together literature about beating cancer. That’s one of the great things about being an American: people in this country just want to do the right thing for others. And having been the recipient of your kindness, I can assure you that I’m doing everything in my power to learn from and emulate your example.” Isn’t that cool?

You want Cabbage with your order? YES!

“Eat your vegetables!” We’ve all heard it throughout our lives, but here’s a gentle reminder. Did you know that the top three cancer-preventing vegetables are eggplant, broccoli and cabbage? Eggplant has chlorogenic acid (helps prevent cancer), broccoli has sulforaphane (which disarms cancer-causing substances) and cabbage has high levels of isothiocyanates(especially good to cut the risk of breast, lung and colon cancers). Put down that cheeseburger!

Don’t be a sheep

I recently read an article in the New York Times about a woman diagnosed with cancer. The first doctor gave her six months to live. The second and third said chemotherapy might buy her a little time, but that was her only option, A fourth offered to operate. The patient’s name is Karen Pasqualetto, and in her support group, she talks about “being saddened to hear how other patients with advanced disease take the word of a single oncologist. She says if she had done that, she would already be dead. Unfortunately, this scenario is all too common, and is yet another example showing that in order to survive cancer you MUST have money, access to hospitals, personal drive and motivation, an education, the ability to sort through the medical world and the insurance maze. Time and time again, “Type A” people are conquering cancer, due to their own determination and tenacity. It shouldn’t have to be that way, but the more I talk to patients across the country, the more I find that the successful ones (and that has MANY different definitions) share that same characteristic. Think about this: there is no one exactly the same as you are. So why would we assume that the standard protocol given to the guy/gal next to you in the waiting room would be exactly what you need? We need to recognize two concepts—that each of us is indeed different and our approaches to how we fight cancer will be different, and (and this is the most important one!) that it’s okay to look out for yourself. Yesterday I talked to a another long-term survivor, who’s mantra is ” Don’t be a sheep. Question everything and be your own best advocate!”

Does anybody really know what time it is?

I don’t know about you, but I quit showing up on time for doctor’s appointments years ago. I am ALWAYS on time, or better yet, early. As I tell my students, in the business world, 15 minutes early is the new “on time”. But when I was thrust into the cancer arena which required spending more time in waiting rooms than I spend asleep (or so it seemed), I began to chafe at the fact that I was NEVER talking to a doctor when my appointment time came around. Just yesterday, I spent 2 1/2 hours in a waiting room, to then spend 12 minutes updating a doctor about my condition (no change), my diet (no change) my side effects (none), and to have my vitals taken (no change). But every now and then, I am surprised and heartened. I went to an initial consultation for a root canal (and that’s always something fun to do!), and I was early (thank heavens…old habits die hard). I was sitting in the waiting room, and a man came in for an appointment. I actually heard the receptionist say “I’m sorry, Mr. Smith, but our appointments are scheduled so that our patients do not have to wait more than 5 minutes to be seen. You were 22 minutes late, so I’ll have to ask you to reschedule.” I about fell over. I love that doctor. I love that receptionist. I love the fact that I can be on time/early and it will be rewarded. If you have anything to do with health care, I challenge you to do the same thing for your patients!

Smart is the New Cool

I am old enough to remember when there were definitive rules for girls and boys through their educational years; when girls wore only dresses, when competitive sports were for boys and physical education classes for girls consisted of either dance or gymnastics, and when girls took home economic classes and boys took math and science.As we move towards a time when gender does not define who we are, we salute those that have helped pave the way. Check out one of our local trendsetters at Smart Girls Rock, an online community for girls who intend to make their mark and change this world for the better. The website is the brain child of local media personality Dayna Steele and Terry McDonald, web designer for a major national space agency. As Dayna says, “smart is the new cool.”

Angel Food - not the cake…

I was reading an email from a friend of mine about an organization called Angel Food Ministries, which helps provide groceries to needy families across the country. The website is Angel Food Ministries. It just might be a lifesaver for my friend, who is about to take on two foster kids into her home, and it looks like a pretty neat program. Anyway, I was leaving work on a lunch break and had stopped to get gas, when a woman tapped me on the shoulder. Middle 40’s maybe, with obviously a tough life behind her. And the first words out of her mouth were “excuse me ma’am, but do you know of any “angel” organizations that help provide food for families? I’m really down on my luck and could use some help.” Needless to say, between the man in the red truck who was filling up his tank next to me, the mother of a toddler in the yellow VW bug and I, she left with more than she came with. And she now has the website to use when she gets home. There are no coincidences….

4th of July

The 4th of July is more than a day off work to most of us–or at least I hope it is! It is a time when we are all united. Americans came together after 9/11 with one sole purpose, to project solidarity against terrorism. That solidarity still exists, but tends to get watered down as the years go by. Still, I saw it demonstrated this afternoon, as the folks that live down the street paused their schedules of work and kids and carpooling and grilling to dig through their respective garages for their American flags. One by one, flags are going up all over the neighborhood. The fact that one neighbor hates the way the other cuts his grass, or that one household has a really annoying dog that keeps another household awake is put on hold. People that don’t normally chat with each other do so as they dust off their flags and tighten the ropes. Right now, the only thing that matters is that we are all, for at least one day, on the same team.

Where, oh where is my little lamb gone…

I walked out my front door this morning to head towards work, only to realize that in order to get in the car, it needs to BE there. Apparently my car was one of the eight other cars either stolen or vandalized in my neighborhood last night. And, while it’s certainly vexing (I love that word) and inconvenient, it’s not the end of the world, right? I didn’t have anything particularly valuable in the car (unlike my neighbor, who lost his laptop). Or at least I didn’t think I did, until I talked with my daughter. She was devastated. “Mom–the little lamb is riding with the bad guys!” was her concern. (By the way, she is a college student, no longer a little girl.) A couple years ago, when I started having to travel to different states for treatment, she put a little stuffed lamb in the back of my car, so “I would never be driving alone.” I’d always kept it there. And now it’s riding around with the bad guys. Right now, I’m hoping that the concept of bad karma is true…..

Higher Education

I just got back from a business trip. Our job was to look at our college curriculum and decide if it was relevant now, and if it would continue to be in the next five years. I know it sounds easy, but in a field like broadcasting things seem to change every day. For instance, I started discussing blogs as a form of mass communication a couple years ago, and almost none of my students knew what I was talking about. They all do now!

It’s a sobering realization that some of the decisions we made in that meeting will impact students from Texas and their education in the years to come. But I was heartened to see that everyone there was cognizant of that responsibility and took it very seriously. (In some cases, almost too seriously…….) Still, what a privilege to be able to contribute to the future. Gee…..sure hope we did the right thing…..hmmmm…..

RFI is A-OK!

What do a respected journalist for National Public Radio, a worldwide Christian publishing house, one of the producers from the Star Wars series, a calendar pin up girl, a cartoonist with a top ten web site (in the world), and I have in common? All of us in some way are championing radiofrequency ablation as a successful alternative treatment for cancer. Just yesterday, a story broke in a major publication in Canada about radiofrequency ablation finally being covered by their health system. Just a few weeks ago, a major insurance company in Tennessee reversed a previous decision and decided to cover radiofrequency ablation. It’s working…………

Heads or Tails?

I spent the better part of last evening with a friend of mine (although we have never met, we have become more intimate than most friends ever get due to our shared status as cancer survivors). She was faced with the challenge of deciding what treatment to try next. The situation is almost impossible to understand unless you’ve been there. Imagine…..you have a terrible disease (okay, not so hard to understand so far). But should you do traditional treatment, which you know has unpleasant side effects? Or perhaps a more alternative treatment that has less unpleasant-ness, but not as much information on what really happens to you down the line? Should you let your body take a break from all those chemicals (because we all know that chemotherapy will eventually cause another cancer). Or should you keep chugging along as long as you can in an effort to keep the cancer at bay? Back and forth, back and forth. The bad part is that no one….NO ONE…..has the right answer. And even worse….you have to second guess yourself.

In the end, she decided to go for alternative treatment. What courage it takes to go forward, one step at a time, into the darkness of the unknown. To everyone that has to make those choices, my sympathy and my admiration go with you. Onward…….

Call your Texas Representative!

Let’s hear it for the Lone Star State! The Lance Armstrong Foundation has helped change the way Texas deals with cancer by spearheading the campaign to pass a bill aimed at cancer research. At this moment, the bills have passed through the Senate Finance Committee (unanimously!), and are now looking for support from the Senate. If passed, the bills allow Texas to invest 3 billion (yes, BILLION) dollars over the next ten years for cutting edge cancer research and programs. If you are in Texas, write your elected officials and tell them how important this is.

My Evaluation

My son and daughter came home from college this weekend for Mother’s Day–the perfect gift! But the moment they walked in the door, I observed something that all cancer survivors experience…..uncertainty. While my children and I talk frequently during the semesters, they don’t actually see me that much. They always ask me how I am feeling after treatment, and are eager to help any way they can, but I know that when they are about to actually see me after a long time, they brace themselves a bit. What if I look different? Weaker somehow, or sick? Have I lost my color or worse, my hair? And for that brief millisecond when our eyes connect, I can see that they are evaluating me. What a weird feeling! But in talking to other cancer patients, it is absolutely normal. I just never thought that I would be the one being evaluated! (oh, and by the way, I look “absolutely the same”, according to my children. I’m taking that to mean that I haven’t aged at all either……….)

Don’t Stop

In a continuation of the Ted Koppel’s “Living With Cancer” program, there were a few suggestions from cancer survivors as to how to continue living with cancer. It boils down to this: You have to continue living. Not just “putting in time”, waiting to see how long you will last, but REALLY living. So….go plant a garden. Enroll in the Book of the Month club. Make travel plans for next summer. Take a foreign language. Enroll in a college course. Learn to ballroom dance. Look forward to your next high school reunion. Make long range plans now for the future. It’ll be here before you know it!

New Mantra…

The war on cancer is gaining momentum, thanks in part to the media. Last night, Ted Koppel (along with Lance Armstrong and Elizabeth Edwards) hosted an amazing program called “Living With Cancer” on the Discovery Channel. One of the featured patients was Leroy Sievers, who discusses his journey through cancer with incredible courage and humor. Mr. Sievers was given the same mantra that I was (”there’s nothing more we can do”), and he too found his way to radiofrequency ablation. The procedure was successful, and while his cancer is not cured (once cancer moves from its original site, I don’t think you can ever be really cured), his future is a lot more optimistic! You can go to the Discovery Channel website for more information on the program, or visit Sievers’ blog at npr.com. Kudos to all the worked so hard to make such an important program.

One thing that rang so true from Lance’s discussions was the “job” of a cancer survivor. (By the way, a cancer “survivor” is anyone who has or has had cancer and is alive to talk about it). Once cancer impacts our lives, it’s almost a sacred responsibility to be there for someone else. To share our experiences. To pass on information. And most importantly, to listen to other survivors with all our attention. Together….but only together….. we can beat cancer.

The 8th Annual National Women’s Health Week

Okay gentlemen, here’s a chance to do something really sweet AND healthy for the significant woman in your life….

The 8th Annual National Women’s Health Week will kick off on Mother’s Day (May 13th…write it down NOW, for goodness sakes!), and will be celebrated until May 19th. National Women’s Check-Up Day is Monday May 14th. National Women’s Health Week encourages women to take simple steps for a longer healthier, and happier life. The theme this year is “It’s Your Time: Pamper Your Mind, Body and Spirit.” During the week, families, businesses, government, health organizations and other groups should come together to celebrate the progress made in women’s health, encourage women to get regular check-ups, and educate women about the steps they can take to improve their physical and mental health and prevent disease.

So—-give the love of your life flowers or candy or lingerie or dinner on the town. But also take the time to ask her how she feels, and make sure she’s taking care of herself. You’ll be giving her a gift that’s worth far more than you can imagine.

What kind of a world do we live in?

Yesterday’s tragic events at Virginia Tech caused Americans everywhere to stop in their tracks and take a deep breath. As a broadcaster, I started evaluating the media coverage and comparing notes with others in the industry. As a parent of two young adults at a university, the “on” switch for the “worry” part of my brain was flipped. Especially since my kids are at the University of Texas, site of the previous record of students killed. As I drove home from work, I noticed flags being lowered to half mast and a general feeling of sadness and depression set in. What kind of a world do we live in, where innocent students in the prime of their lives are gunned down? How can our country hope to continue? As I thought about it, I looked over just in time to see a car blow out a tire on the freeway, and manage to negotiate to the side of the road (a rather amazing feat, given the fact that it was Houston in drive time!). Almost immediately, not one or two but three cars stopped to offer help. Total strangers just checking on someone in need. It reminded me that while there are some bad people in the world, there are many many many more good ones. Take some comfort in that.

Song in your heart?

This week marked the launch of an international competition based around song lyrics! Aspiring songwriters from around the world have a chance to submit entries to a song called “Oceans of Love - The Song the World Wrote.” The contest is designed to achieve two goals–to bring people together to promote love, peace and ‘paying it forward’, and to help win the battle against cancer. What makes the contest so unique is that anyone can enter a line, and visitors to the web site vote at the end of each week to determine which entry becomes the next line of the song. The contest runs for 24 weeks, and all entries are taken online at the official web site—www.songtheworldwrote.com. It’s yet another way to unify the world against cancer…….

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter! This was the first yeat that the Easter Bunny did not visit my house, with kids away at college. However, I was busy developing responses to the amazing articles that seem to be everywhere right now, all from national figures that have been struck with cancer and want to share their stories. Bless Newsweek’s Jonathan Alter, Elizabeth Edwards, White House Press Secretary Tony Snow and of course Lance Armstrong for being brave enough to let us into their lives and the maze that is cancer. Through them, cancer now has a face, which levels the playing field. Our thanks to those that share their stories on a national level for reminding us that we are not alone.

Ablation Update

Forgive the delay in postings, but the end of last month was pretty crazy! In the last few weeks, I (well, a group of people actually) managed to pull off something fairly miraculous. As of my last report from my oncologist, I had only one cancer tumor left, but it has been there a LONG time, since it sits on my aorta. Not too much you can do with that! However, through a series of bizarre coincidences (and we all know that coincidences are just God’s way of making sure no one gets the credit), I was able to have a radiofrequency ablation procedure done on that last tumor! I saw the scans afterwards, and it is so amazing that a needle can get so close to the heart and not puncture it, while still heat up enough to destroy cancer cells right next to it! So as of now, I am undergoing yet another 16 week round of chemotherapy, which is standard procedure for post-ablation, and then we’ll see what’s next. Thanks for all your thoughts….oh, and stay tuned for some updates to the website, courtesy of our webmaster….coming soon!

Get Tested!

Welcome to March! This is National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month. If you are 50 or older, or if you have cancer in your family tree, sign up for your very own colonoscopy now! If Katie Couric can do it on television, you can do it in the privacy of your friendly gastroenterologist’s office! There are nearly 115,000 folks that will be diagnosed with colon cancer this year, and this is a very preventable disease. (My kids had their first colonoscopy at 19 and 20…veryy young, but very smart!). Pass the word…..

If Andy Rooney Can, Why Can’t I?

Random thoughts:

Am I the only one that sits at stoplights and counts the number of drivers that are on the phone? Have you ever noticed that smokers have the cleanest ashtrays in their cars (because they seem to throw their cigarette butts out the window)? Does anyone else look closely at people in the grocery store and wonder what their lives are like? Have you ever believed in something so passionately that you positively cannot understand how anyone could take the opposite stance? And does it make you mad when they do?

Like I said, random. If only I could harness all the time my mind spends mulling over thoughts like this and make some money at it!

Collectors, Part 2

The emails are coming in fast and furious, and I just had to share. I had posed the question “what do you collect?”, and whew! some of the answers are wild! Personally, I collect coins, linen handkerchiefs (yes, that’s a strange one), porcelain hinged boxes, and blue and white china. Now, here are the answers so far–

The most popular items to collect seem to be silver spoons, thimbles, shot glasses from vacations, china tea cups, lapel pins from ski resorts and beads from an assortment of Mardi Gras events.

Next are hub caps, comic books, angels, Nancy Drew books (I have those too, as well as the Hardy Boys), Christmas ornaments of a certain type, and the magazines Playboy and National Geographic.

The oddest (so far) are pop tops from soda cans (someone has over 9000 of them!), wrist bracelets from different medical operations, human teeth (?) and photos of headstones in cemetaries with the same last name.

I’m always interested in what’s out there…….

Collectors

I got into an interesting discussion with a man on a late night flight I was on this weekend. He was going through that “Sky Mall” magazine with all the weird things in it, looking for golf balls. He collects golf balls from everywhere, and said he had about 3000 (really!) of them that were displayed in his house. (which leads me to wonder where he keeps them, and who dusts them?)

Anyway, we got to talking about collections…..and my question to you is “what do you collect?”

Gifts from God

I’ve heard parents say that their children are “a gift from God”, but never heard an example quite so poignant as I did this weekend. I met a woman who had one child, and she and her husband desperately wanted another. They tried and tried, to no avail. Fertility treatments, still nothing. Finally they decided to give up on adding to their family, and to move on with life. They planned a wonderfully exotic trip to Thailand, complete with side trips to several islands–something they had wanted to do together for years. As the date approached, they became more and more excited. And suddenly, the woman found out she was pregnant. A miracle! A gift from God! But wait, there’s more. Because she was an “older mother”, she was forbidden to travel. The trip had to be canceled. They were crushed. Their departure date came….and left. Life went on. And then the tragic news of a tsunami that hit the exact area that they would have been staying. Had it not been for their (yet unborn) child, they would have been there.

They named their daughter Caris (from the Biblical “Charis”, meaning “grace”). I have no doubt that she will do amazing things in her lifetime.

Movie Musings

A friend and I were discussing a movie I watched recently called Jeremiah Johnson, which came out around 1972 and starred Robert Redford. The movie made a big impact on me (apart from the fact that Redford was in it….I would be content just to watch him read the phone book.) I lamented about how incredibly difficult life must have been for this “mountain man”, when the sum total of each day was spent trying to find food in the inhospitable frozen mountains. Every single moment was dedicated to staying alive, and at the end of each day, you knew that the next one would be exactly the same. But my friend had a different take. “How easy it must have been!” he pointed out. No working by committee, no meetings, no hidden agendas, no juggling money, no responsibilities other than finding food and surviving. How freeing must that have been?! Your only responsibility was to yourself, and you relied on no one but yourself. Life was black and white, with absolutely no shades of grey. You either made it or you didn’t. Makes me wonder……

Gratitude

Today will be spent in gratitude. I give thanks for an anonymous benefactor. For a connection from the (long ago!) past who can help me with my family. For the friend at lunch that asked for a “to-go box” and then gave it to me. For the person that smiles at me for no reason. For a job well done. For a student that is excited to come to class. For my children that call just to say hello (and to tell me that there is snow on their balcony!)

Your Resolutions

I have been amazed at the New Year Resolutions that have come in over the past two weeks; not so much at the number, but at the sheer variety of them all. It just goes to show you that we are all indeed very different, with very different priorities and mind sets.I certainly can’t write all of them, but some of the most interesting New Year Resolutions were:

Eat less red meat. Whine less. Find a charity. Love more. Quit cussing.Try to take the high road. Do something that scares me. Don’t play it safe. Learn to love vegetables. Be more unexpected. Kiss my spouse every day, even when I want to kill him/her. Save money, even if it’s only a dollar a week. Buy a new frying pan (yes, really!) Take up a hobby. Actually read the newspapers every day. Take the time to listen to people. Quit multi-tasking (which contradicts the next one..) Be more efficient. Ask for advice more often. Ask for directions. Touch the ones I love more often. Quit kicking the dog. Stop smoking.

The best resolution I’ve found was to “be mindful”. Loosely translated, it means to try and make the best decisions possible, and covers everything from what to order at a restaurant to whether or not to unload on someone that’s irritated you to deciding on how to spend free time. Bottom line? We all want to be the best we can be.

Happy New Year!

Stepping into a new year is always a bit exciting. It’s another chance for a fresh start, a new beginning, full of possibilities and promise. For a cancer patient, that excitment is laced with deep thankfulness and a renewed focus. I talk to a LOT of patients, and their new year’s resolutions are a bit different than the typical ones you hear at the proverbial water cooler.

So….did YOU make a New Year’s resolution? What was it? Please share with us….